red plastic laminate is my favorite

HAPPY LAST-PHYSICS-LAB-EVER DAY!

so, yesterday was a scary day. i think i hit my emotional maximum. i'm almost positive that the majority of the population holds much higher emotional maximums than i do and are less impressionable and more able to disregard or set aside minor emotions, but i can only take so much and that is me.

for some reason, i have been singled out so many times lately, not necessarily for anything i have done, but for things that are out of my control (such as: i am korean but was not raised to speak fluent korean), and i must say, it makes me tired.

the french are glad to die for love

when you were little, did you ever spend hours in the shower and pretend to be Gi the water planeteer by shooting water out of your fingers? well, that's how i spent my lunch hour today. do you know how good an all-the-way-hot shower feels when it's unexpectedly chilly outside and you are grossly sick? just the other day, i was thinking of how awesome my immune system is for not letting me get sick at all year. damn, i spoke two weeks too soon. it just better not be mono, which my friend-who-i-have-not-made-out-with has, or mumps.

bla bla. all i want to do is sleep.

yesterday i realized that most of my life is scribbled on the back of an old, random sheet of paper. my class schedule, important to-do lists, phone numbers, addresses, passwords, deadlines, quotes, random thoughts, paper outlines, book recommendations, laundry times, songs to download, and the correct spellings of words that i tend to mispell frequently... all of it on this little sheet of paper tucked underneath my keyboard! i am amazed that i have not lost some vital pieces of information because this paper was accidentally swept into the garbage or misplaced in my desk-sea of papers. i must say, this sheet of carelessness is a nice little memoir of the past semester. i call it my alternative (lazy) way of scrapbooking.

on saturday, i am pretty sure i must do homework instead of going to mifflin and, consequently, being absolutely useless for the next many hours after. wow leah, what a mature decision. i know. so instead, on saturday i am creating a party for myself in my room with these endearing and classic dance songs that i have been listening to for the last two days:

everytime we touch- cascada
s.o.s.- rhiana
temperature- sean paul

pretty in pink

today i strolled around campus in a fuschia-colored skirt while eating a raspberry ice cream cone with a pink flower in my hair. i just had to document that and let the world know of my extraordinary abilities to match clothing and food. i love when you feel like you look pretty pretty despite feeling like all your ambitions and enthusiasm have been lost.

oh no. lately i have been unhealthy. sitting around on my arse and getting mary kay products delivered to my door, indulging in television, not eating three well-balanced meals a day, not getting anywhere on homework- a problem that will not be fixed this weekend.

...laundry in 4 minutes!

my grandpa is getting older and his mental faculties are slowly slipping away. talking about this with my parents makes me so so sad. and fake 'planned parenthood' clinics created by pro-lifers just piss me off. and having a zillion questions and apprehensions about korea without answers because my advisor is a professor trelawny clone that has the attention span of a 1 year old just makes me go EKKKKKK.

movies this weekend: l' enfant, the davinci code, cache?
you do realize that this post was really just an excuse to make a movie list.

no, not now

two minor realizations within the past few days, besides the fact that i must must must spend millions billions trillions of hours studying and/or "crafting" BEFORE finals get here:

-i suck at identifying Asian races.

-i hate PDA. the boys and girls, boys and boys, girls and girls... all of it. the hand holding and mushy talk and staring into each other's eyes is just so utterly disgusting when you are not a participant. i am sorry to all of the couples around campus, because i not-so-secretly want to punch you in the face.

later, i want to write about my fantastic weekend (oh, i finally posted new pictures) and how i am suddenly scared shitless of 1) biotechnological advancements, specifically, germ-line engineering, as i write a paper on it and 2) the eventual global spread of the avian influenza.

perfume and peanut butter cookies

minus the tiny flash of hell before my eyes from 3-5pm this afternoon, the past couple days have been some of the most beautiful ever. and the weather is just a bonus. they've been the kind of days where i want to run home and tell my family every detail. people are warm and kind-hearted. i've been spontaneous by skipping class to go splurging on summer dresses or to pick out the most delicious grapes from the fruit vendor on state. i went out to dinner tonight with a friend who has decided to kind of reform her life from drunken debauchery to Jesus, and that was an extremely interesting and much-needed chat.

the greatest part is that all of this goodness still continues to happen even while mucking my way through school shitake. i feel pretty damn useless when i have to relearn things that i have already learned in high school, but have forgotten, or when i have to relearn things that i have already learned even just last semester, but have forgotten. i so wish i had a cam jensen-esque photographic memory. then, i could star in young adult novels and help solve mysteries to get the bad guys WHILE learning more and more, instead of feeling like i have been running on a tredmill for 2 years straight.

i think i want to be a more boring and annoying writer. write to include all of the details that nobody cares about and all of the "hehe"s and cheesy smilely faces that everyone barfs at. mmmhm! you know you love me. sidenote: i miss gossip girls.

i am ready for this weekend like no other. SLITHER! SERENITY! (THE) SQUID & THE WHALE!

i hate school

I HATE SCHOOL. if i don't leave by 1pm on friday, i will gouge my eyeballs out and bite my tongue off. that is a promise.

okay, now time to go sit outside and soak up that vitamin D.

why not

so, i was reading some sabrina ward harrison tonight... but before i forget, tonight i saw "breakfast on pluto" which i did not like at all. when i left the movie i just felt so... anxious. maybe because i was sitting behind a middle-aged man who made me uncomfortable by laughing too loudly and dancing in his seat to the background music? i don't know. i am jumpy lately, like for example, i seriously screamed in "the sound of music" and covered my eyes at the part when liesl climbs into maria's room through the window in the middle of the night. that's not normal. also tonight, kate asked if anyone wanted to go SKYDIVING next weekend, which heightened my already apprehensive mood. i'm pretty sure skydiving for me would be 100% hell and 0% fun.

now, back to what i was initially saying. here is a part of a page from the book i was reading, a letter by a 85-year-old woman. at first i thought it was unoriginal, but then i got over it and began to love it.

"If I had my life to live over I'd try to make more mistakes next time. I would relax. I would limber up. I'd be sillier than I have been. I know of a very few things I would take seriously. I would be less hygenic. I would take more chances. I would take more trips. I would burn more gasoline and eat more ice cream and less beans. I would have actual troubles and fewer imaginary ones. You see I'm one of those people who lives sensibly and sanely hour after hour, day after day. Oh, I've had my moments, and if I had my life to live over I'd have more of them. In fact I'd have nothing else- just moments one after another instead of living so many years ahead each day. If I had my life to live over I would start barefoot earlier in the spring and stay that way later in the fall. I would play hooky more. I wouldn't make such good grades, except by accident."

i really need to make this list right now.

things that make me feel grounded:
*talking about the weather
*barefeet wrapped in bedsheets
*memorized movies
*seeing my grandparents at church
*rereading old journals
*car rides
*leaning on my kitchen counter and sorting the mail
*choreographed dancing
*red delicious apple slices
*the sound of morning doves
*listening to my mum tell a funny story
*fat sharpie markers

the sound of music

i love being silly and doing a bit of drunken dancing on friday nights and making microwave feasts in the wee hours while trading love advice with dustin and then getting SUNBURNED on my run in 32-degree weather the next morning and cracking up in the library while listening to the latest high school obsession, dane cook.

i need to learn how to be more polite on the phone.

it's for sure that tonight i will be studying and chilling with amy and her cool movies (aka: the sound of music). yes!

a date

good things:
*stealing manda's dark chocolate matzoh and eating it ALL before passover even starts! MUWAHA!
*coordinating class schedules
*1:02:03 on wednesday morning
*STARTING MY WEBSITE!
*seeing kids that i know on campus tours
*monday/wednesday lunch dates at union south
*emily's senior thesis on norwegian knitting
*getting together with your closest design friends and bitching about the business majors
*the best dorm dance partay EVER
*sheet metal